Julius Bloop

Biggie 1920's Parody: http://bit.ly/i4Pmvs
Biggie Medieval Parody: http://bit.ly/nR4U31
Biggie Elderly Parody: http://bit.ly/p7zUfk

Notorious BIG is my favorite rapper of all time and Ready To Die is my favorite album. This parody is an homage to his incredible style and story-telling ability. Hope you like it - peace!

Ready To Cry

As I grab the bottle, put it to my mouthpiece
One in the diaper, the onesie is off, relief
Eight in the morn, born - Placenta in-between us
Baby smalls the fetus, conceived from too much margaritas
Cheerios - the material - for my dry cereal
Food dipper, puke dripper, the nipple sipper
I drop my head up and down like a baby swing
Quick to grab the teething ring and make it soothe
my gums all night, blocks and toys are expected when I exit
My soft spot's decrepit, protect it.
I got car seats savin' my soft butt cheeks
Sleep on my side so I don't choke in my sleep, huh
My grip is weak, weaker than a smushed pea
I'm ready to cry and nobody can shush me
Hate the crib, hate the bath and the nurse
My life couldn't start out any worse
I'm ready to cry!

As I lay here and stare from atop my high chair
No, I'm never gone share my crib toys or teddy bears
A small mad future toddler that was born breech
I got them front row tickets to the section C
I want it all from pascettio's to my big toes
Sesame is the street where my brain grows
My mother didn't give me what I want, a rubber duck.
Bathing in a bucket with a thumb that I can suck
Clowns are real, and frightened's how I feel
I shriek and squeal cause that bozo got that freak appeal
Knockin' noodles on the floor cause I'm bored
Never get in trouble cause I'm totally adored
Got this gas gotta pass so hold steady
You better burp me now cause I'm ready, ready

In a sec, I rip the bib from my floppy neck
Even though I'm just a speck, entire kitchens I can wreck
Quick to put me in a walker, goo gaa talker
I'd rather stay with grandma - that wrinkled rocker
When it's gerber, don't feed into my anger
The spoon is not an airplane my mouth is not hangar
My face, the teet, they meet we're chompin'
Sippin' sippees from teletubbie to tonka
Baby smalls gotta potty train
Mothers say I'm cute, minute because I sound like a flute when I toot
Make your nose wrinkle
Sing the stars like twinkle till I'm rippin' van winkle
After the nap, strap me in a sack like backpack
Shake me shakin' back and get your peek-a-booin' face smacked
Don't try to sneak, countin' any sheep
Mom and dad never gonna sleep. I'm ready to cry!

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