You wanna know who I am? Too bad! I am part of a secret squad of undercover spies (some say we are working for the government, truth is we are working for RMD (Ronald McDonald)). We don't have guns. We have pizzas. Of which we have washed with the water bathed by a thousand hobos. We don't do drugs, we get high off high fructose corn syrup. We are trained in the way of the camel and can survive for weeks at a time. Living only off of canned bread. Shiny purple things are our weakness. We will take away their metal boxes. We make pudding at four in the morning. We just really love cats *sniff sniff*. We can't find the chapstick. We bring our Wii motes everywhere.

But... our worst enemy.... it is said if you say his name you shall be cursed by the souls of the many lost chickens. Be aware that large amounts of poultrygeist activity may occur. Very dangerous. His name... is the Burger King. Our greatest competitor in our fast food marketing chain.

Wendy's are our allies. Dairy Queen is neutral. Serving its delicious dairy to both sides of this deep fried terror!

WE WANT YOU- TO EAT OUR FRIES.
+Burgers and shake optional+